A son has written a brutal obituary about his father, accusing him of being narcissistic and abusive.
He describes the deceased father as “a womanizer” and an “abusive alcoholic” who “was not a father to anyone” and lived “a long life, much longer than he deserved.” Now, he going viral online.
Lawrence H. Pfaff Sr., who was born in Belmont, N.Y., on April 16, 1941, died on June 27, 2022, according to an obit published in the Florida Times-Union over the holiday weekend. He was 81 but lived “much longer than he deserved,” Lawrence H. Pfaff Jr. wrote.
“He is survived by his three children, no four. Oops, five children. Well as of 2022 we believe there is one more that we know about, but there could be more. His love was abundant when it came to himself, but for his children it was limited,” the obit said. “From a young age, he was a ladies’ man and an abusive alcoholic, solidifying his commitment to both with the path of destruction he left behind, damaging his adult children, and leaving them broken.”
Pfaff Jr., who told WTLV he hadn’t talked to his father in 30 years, said Pfaff Sr. abused his first wife and children. His father also had his gun and badge taken away by the New York Police Department after 20 years in the NYPD due to alcohol addiction and “negligent at best” service.
According to the cop’s son, he actually started working on it a year before his father passed. According to an interview with Jacksonville.com, Pfaff Jr. said his father left when he was nine years old, and he didn’t know for sure how many siblings he had. He found some half-brothers and half-sisters through DNA testing.
His goal was to speak his truth, so he could heal. Pfaff Jr. wrote:
“It will be challenging to miss Lawrence, Sr. because he was narcissistic. He was incapable of love. Lawrence, Sr.’s passing proves that evil does eventually die, and it marks a time of healing, which will allow his children to get the closure they deserve. Lawrence, Sr. can be remembered for being a father to many, and a dad to none.”
Pfaff Jr. expected some negative feedback to his obituary for a sociopath and was surprised at the number of positive comments. Other people, who suffered from their own abusive parents, found his truth to be healing.
“Lawrence Sr.’s hobbies included abusing his first wife and children. He loved to start projects but never followed through on any of them. He enjoyed the life of a bar fly for many years and had a quaint little living space, studio, above his favorite hole in the wall, the club Nashville.
“Lawrence Sr. did spend over twenty years in the NYPD, but even his time in service was negligent at best. Because of his alcohol addiction, his Commanding Officer took away his gun and badge, replacing them with a broom until he could get his act together. Lawrence Sr. did claim to be clean and sober for over thirty years but never worked any of the twelve steps, including the eight and ninth steps with his children, making amends. He possessed no redeeming qualities for his children, including the ones he knew and the ‘ones he knew about.’”
Newspaper chain Gannett has apologized for publishing an obituary of a former NYPD cop that labeled him as a narcissist and an abusive alcoholic.
The Gannett Company, which owns the newspaper, gave the following statement, “We regrettably published an obituary that did not adhere to our guidelines and we are looking into the matter further. We regret any distress this may have caused.”
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